Daddy Discipline

Of course, there are no special rules for "daddy discipline". Discipline strategies work regardless of the gender of the parent. But sometimes there are advantages to having a deep voice or to being the parent who is not home all day. The foundation for effective discipline will forever and always remain the same.

Mean what you say. Say things once and never more than twice. Be prepared to "act on your message". That is, for young children, be prepared to get up and remove them from the situation. For older children, be prepared to reinforce your message by waiting for compliance or by explaining the consequence of noncompliance.

Say what you mean. Keep your messages simple and direct by focusing on the behavior that you want to see. State your expectations in the positive by changing "no's" into "do's". Very often young children never hear the "don'ts". They only hear "blah blah blah stand on the table". Older children learn quickly to tune out the barrage of negatives and miss the point completely.

Stay three steps ahead of the situation. We, as adults, can always be ready for anything children do. The trick is to know where children will sabotage our efforts. They sabotage us when we are rushing, when we are preoccupied with our adult agenda, or when we're looking for an easy way out. The best discipline is planned in advance, when we are not emotionally involved in the moment.

If your child is "testing", shut it done quickly. Most times, children find themselves in difficult situations because they lack the ability to make good choices or they do not have the social/emotional skills for self control. However, there are times when your child just wants to check if today's boundaries are the same as yesterday's. This is, in no way, a personal affront to your authority, though it definitely looks like it. It is, instead, your child's job! Becoming a person requires an emotional push and pull with the people you love and trust the most - which just happens to be you. Now it's your job to set clear limits.

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